AITA: Baby's 1st Christmas Drama

Baby's first Christmas is such a special and sentimental occasion.

Mummies and daddies could and should be forgiven for wanting to mark this major milestone in the way that suits them; be it a massive family Christmas with the extended clan, or a small and quiet day alone with their baby, perhaps with a visit from grandparents later on in the day. It is their prerogative, ultimately.

Well, in a perfect world it is, anyway. As we all know, family doesn't always see eye to eye, especially when it comes to children, and most definitely not when it comes to the involvement of in-laws! One very upset mum took to the Reddit AITA (Am I The Asshole) board to ask if she's in the wrong in this rather sensitive situation...

Read the full post below.

"Before my daughter was born, I (F, 21) told my husband (M,21) that Christmas morning would be for myself, my daughter, and my husband ONLY. I want to start our own family traditions, and we solely saw his side of the family for the holidays last year. I mentioned this to my FIL saying, we would be available Xmas eve or Christmas night. He told me that “we can come whenever, but we would not be receiving gifts, UNLESS we were there Christmas morning.” I brushed it off, and figured I would have my husband talk to him in the weeks following.

Shortly after, my husband received a group text, that I was not in that said Christmas would be at FIL’s house at 6am. I told my husband that is a ridiculous time, and I would not be waking our 8 month old from her sleep to cater to his dad’s wishes. The week following, we went to FILs house to visit. My husband says to his dad “Andrea doesn’t want to come to Xmas that early, can we do a later time.” To which they agreed on 8am, without asking me. I was upset my husband threw me under the bus, and still agreed on a time that would not allow us to have our own Christmas morning at home. I felt I was being robbed of my daughters First Christmas, but I let in slide in thoughts that my daughter wouldn’t remember since she’s still so little. The in laws even tried to get us to stay the night Xmas Eve, but I said no.

We arrived at FILs house at 7:30am. We got multiple snide remarks that they were surprised we could get up so early. Everyone was already done opening gifts by the time we got there. Each of the new significant others of my husbands siblings got gifts, my husband, my daughter, EVERYONE received a gift except for me. I have been part of the family for 5 years now, and they have always made a point to get me something. Although I don’t expect a gift, I felt like I was being punished for not doing what they wanted.

I feel it was a malicious act, I feel guilt-tripped, and heartbroken. AITA?"

Read the main thread here on Reddit

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What was the general consensus?

The poster was reassured by hoardes of readers that she is absolutely NTA for this situation; she was guilt-tripped and treated with huge disrespect, with the proverbial icing on the cake being the clearly deliberate lack of gift. The top rated comment was...

"NTA. Your husband’s family sounds entitled and petty, and are acting childish. You really should have an honest talk with your husband: he needs to stand up for you and establish boundaries and lines of respect with his parents and immediate family."

Our verdict...

The top rated comment says it all, really. We're emotionally exhausted for this poor mum reading her post and can imagine that this is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to dealing with her family-in-law; it's all very passive aggressive and petty. We really feel for her and hope that she is able to speak up to advocate for herself - and also knock her husband into line as he's enabling this poor behaviour from his family.

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