What is a helicopter parent? A helicopter parent is a parent who hovers over the kids all the time, watching every move and waits for something to happen…

I used to be that mum!

I would be the first one to be jumping in there to stop something from happening. I would be the first one (and probably the only one) shouting my kids name.

We have all been to kids parties. They are crazy insane with loads of energy, probably loads of sugar, and I hear what you’re thinking. THEY ARE LOUD!

So many kids in probably a small amount of space does sound like a nightmare in itself, but I think it goes without saying. Things will happen. Generally though, parents tend to make more of a fuss.

I’m not going to lie, parties set me off with anxiety… They have done for at least the last year. The loud music, the number of kids in one place, I just know that my kid will be the one child that gets told off repeatedly. Probably because I put too much pressure on the situation myself. I was probably to blame.

The last few times we have been to parties though have been a game changer. I haven’t hovered.

That was literally the trick.

I mean I still watch my kids, it’s not that I’m not watching them. I’m just not over analysing every little move he makes. I’m not fussing!

That was all it took!

I will have a quick chat with K before we go out of the house. Give a quick reminder of rules before we’ve gone in, and that’s it. He has a good time. And I stop stressing!

I have really enjoyed the last couple of parties and I do put it down to him just being comfortable, and me, to just let him be a kid. I haven’t had to say his name once (Well maybe once) but it has been a lot less stressful.

Since then I have watched him do a conga line, I have watched him dance in dance games, we haven’t had one incident where he’s needed to take a time out!

And that is why I won’t be a helicopter mum, it doesn’t actually help the situation. It just adds more pressure on him to conform and behave. This just makes him more awkward and leads to him misbehaving even more than he would of if I’d have just let him get on with it. He needs to learn for himself.

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Written by Steph Gray for her blog 21st Century Parent.

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