Quarantined With Small Children

So times have been hard recently with this whole COVID-19 pandemic going around the world…it’s been scary, emotional and eye opening for some. But as a parent of a 4 and 2 year old it’s been hell!

Fights about whose toy are whose and he is sat in the exact seat I am suppose to be in on the sofa…and then when the youngest has had enough he will tantrum at me for asking him to put his toys away for lunch or dinner…it’s been endless fights and “f**k this” moments…and I know I’m not alone on this one…I just have imagined teachers around the world at home with a glass of wine relaxing like some super villain saying “you give me your kids for hours a day, about time you know what we have to put up with”

Trying to find things for them to do…not allowed to go to the parks so rules that out…we can leave the house to go to the fields but they want to play on the swings…and try and explain why you can’t…try and educate them…again back to the teachers thinking about the incredible lessons plans they had for this semester for them all thrown out the window and we now had to rely on the next generation of kids being educated by the parents…IM NOT A TEACHER! I RELY HEAVILY ON GOOGLE or SIRI!

I have researched things on google, sheets of paper to print so they can educate the kids, this ends up in a fight because one has the other ones colouring pen colour…ok we shall watch a movie after this…turns into critics choice because one wants one film and the other wants another one…me as the parent puts on a neutral choice and the house gets moaned down at the crap choice dad has put on…I actually think legally blonde is very educating…

Trying to use zoom to see family members who have birthdays and just to say hello, using slime that we have saved for a later date to try and pass some time. I’ve even resulted into sending my wife memes about going shopping who is sitting 2ft away from me on the sofa, drinking more then enough tea and coffee to run dry a whole plantation and eating because well, being bored that’s why…

Car journeys have changed now we aren’t allowed to go into Tesco for the family trip when we are bored…we end up having to play rock, paper, scissors to see who will get the joyous shop alone…while the other gets to fight with the kids to not beep the horn, change the radio station or turn every button on in the car so we aren’t driving down the road getting attention from the police because every light is on, wipers going and the alarm sounding…

I know the government are trying their best and so are the incredible doctors and nurses or research facilities and the NHS…but I’m not going to lie about it, this is hard, it’s difficult being with tiny versions of yourself 24/7…I love my kids don’t get me wrong and I understand it’s what needs to be done to get back to normal, please have a plan in place for schooling if this ever happens again. Like a package that gets sent out to every home with worksheets, teaching plans or a colouring book and pens…

Until next time…

The Hairy Father