Motherhood is not a hobby, it is a blessed lifelong calling. A calling to love unconditionally, a calling to instruct hearts, a calling to be present.
As a busy passionate mum there will be times when you feel the role you play as a mum can be a relatively hidden one and often unappreciated as compared to a career or business where your efforts and actions tend to be more visible and often recognized by your boss, stakeholders or customers.
- No one might see that occasionally you have to run from the school car park with a child to ensure they make it in time before the school bell rings and school gates are shut. That the child has maintained 100% attendance in school is a miracle in itself.
- No one might see that you have to sit patiently with a restless and talkative year 1 school child and supervise him as he writes out 25 Christmas cards to his school mates.
- No one might seem to realise how much patience and brain work is required to sit down with a restless child to do homework.
- No one might see how you decide to give up (obviously feeling like a failure) after trying hard (in your work clothes) to feed a fussy toddler healthy home made food and then resort to toast and jam for dinner.
- No one might see the bickering and sibling fights you have to deal with on a daily basis.
- No one might see how constantly needy the kids can be. “Mummy I want Ribena”, “”Mummy I want water”, “Mummy I want Yogurt”, “Mummy I want my pillow”, “Mummy call grandpa”, “Mummy I want to watch boss baby”, “Mummy he changed the channel”, “Mummy they asked us to wear a spotty top to school tomorrow”.
- No one might see your anger and frustration when you see yet another of your exquisite Christmas decoration, flower vase or even worse iPAD shattered by the toddler.
- No one might see the amount of hours and effort you spend on sourcing, prepping and cooking home made food which eventually might end up uneaten by a fussy toddler and infact you might not even have any appetite to eat yourself.
- No one might know how much resources (time, money and effort) you put into children’s classes such as swimming, football and yet you might see very little progress being made.
- No one might see how you have to deal with a toddler that keeps getting out of their bed at night.
- No one might see the rare nights where you had to spend several hours in the A&E waiting room with a sick child.
- No one might see the amount of anxiety you have to carry around, how you sometimes wake up in the middle of the night to pray for your children.
- No one might see how you have to deal with school issues and incidents- child fell down on playground, child got bitten in nursery, child got hit near the eye, after school football club is cancelled today come and collect your child in 10 minutes, your child has a red rash on his face, do you want to come and collect him?
- No one might see the many nights you can get so tired after finally getting both kids to bed that you barely have any physical or emotional strength left to sort adult dinner, watch TV or even speak to anyone.
- No one realises how you have to take so much time off work because of childcare issues, activities or illness.
- No one might seem to realize that as an introvert, having to have your “ON” button always turned on is very draining.
- No one might see how you might be very unwell yourself but still have to fulfil your motherhood and work responsibilities.
While we are one earth in this mothering season, our priority ministry is often confined to the four walls of a house which makes it easy for people looking from the outside to either think you’re a super mum or the judgemental folks who would think you must be a bad mum for managing (despite the obstacles) to continue with the passions and ambitions you had way before having kids.
I am far from perfect and still working on myself everyday to empty the resentment I sometimes feel towards sorting out the household supplies, cooking, emptying the bin, replacing the toilet rolls, doing the dishes, tidying up, getting the kids ready, doing homework, school projects, bedtime routines. I want to relieve myself of the anger I feel whenever my motherhood style is being judged or questioned by those that should really be supportive. I want to stop viewing my children as burdens to my passions or as obstacles to my career advancement. I want to learn to serve them without much appreciation, obviously appreciation will be welcomed. I want to avoid being physically present but emotionally distant.
Children are blessings no matter the circumstances. So we need to nurture these blessings well so that they end up being a blessing instead of a nuisance.
Motherhood is a choice you make everyday to put someone’s happiness and well being ahead of your own. To teach the hard lessons, to do the right thing even when you might not be sure what the right thing is and to forgive yourself over and over again for doing something wrong.
Motherhood is a ministry of love and sacrifice
Motherhood is a divine calling
Our hidden work and sacrifices as mothers are not unimportant or insignificant, because underneath the nose-wiping, tears, fights, chaos, fussy eating, and tantrums is a great glory resulting in eternal benefits. Let us not wait for man or woman to recognise our work. Be encouraged to see motherhood as a very important ministry, a great and rewarding ministry which we are privileged to be a part of. Embrace the high calling of motherhood today. Don’t let anyone trivialise the work you do as a mother.
What does Motherhood mean to you? What are some of the “hidden things” you do for your children that could tend to go unnoticed or unappreciated?
Many times I have considered stopping this blog due to my BUSY schedule but I get lots of messages from overwhelmed mums (just like me) that constantly need encouragement and inspiration so please pray for the strength and grace to continue the blog this year. If you enjoyed reading this post, please leave a comment below and share with your friends. Thank you for reading!
Written by Folakemi Sebiotimo for her blog, Peacocks Can Fly.
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