Kindness.

Luca youre a shit mummy.
Lochlann deserves better. Josh deserves better than you, hes probably embarrassed to be seen with you.
Look at the state of you now. Covered in stretch marks and ur boobs have gone south.
Your hair is a mess, your skin is a mess, you are a mess. You have zero talent.
Noone even likes you.
You are nothing. I hate you.

Im welling up as im writing this. Because up until recently, those are the thoughts that pestered me daily. There was never a day where i wasnt beating myself up. I was filled with an abnormal amount of self hatred i was afraid i might never shift.

Why would i think such awful thoughts? Because for years i let the opinions of various insignificants define how i felt about myself. I gave away too much of my power.

Recently, and only so recently as in the last lot of months i have slowly but surely grabbed back my power. Grabbed it by the balls. I had a lightbulb moment, and it really is so effing simple.

Kindness.

Kindness? We hear alot latley about kindness, be kind to others, everyone is fighting a battle. Thats ok, be kind to others, but what about being kind to the most important person? That being, yourself. Be kind to yourself. Thats all it takes.

Think of it this way, we are kind to the ones we love, kindness comes in many forms, for example, i am kind to my son, i feed him, clothe him, cuddle him, wipe his tears, make him laugh, sing him to sleep, bath him ect. For a period of time i was so low i would go days without showering, eating too much or too little, not even getting dressed or brushing my hair, the simplest tasks seemed like too much hard work. I felt like nothing therefore it showed, physically. I was happy to show all the kindness in the world for my son but not an ounce for myself. Thats when it hit me, people thrive on kindness, maybe i could thrive and convince myself i am worthy of it too! I had to make a change to my mindset, it was wearing me down, and Josh too, he shows me all the kindness in the world but i never accepted it or believed that his kindness was genuine, all because of how i felt about myself. Isnt that crazy?

Now when i say be kind to yourself I dont mean splash out on expensive materialistic stuff thatll only give you a temporary happiness. You must look closer at what you already have, and see the beauty in EVERYTHING around you, including yourself. Take some you time and have a bath, go for a walk, get out into nature, look at the sky and the clouds, breathe in fresh air, feel the ground beneath your feet, realise and remind yourself that it is a miracle that you are even here at all. Always challenge that inner negative dialogue, when the thoughts turn bad, remind yourself of who you are.

Get naked. By all means get naked and just look at yourself. Look at your flaws, tell yourself its ok to have them, we all do, noone is perfect. Compliment yourself, and see how perfectly unique you really are, every single cell in your body is a miracle.

Got body hair? Good, itll keep you warm.
Got scars? It shows you were stronger that whatever it was caused the scar.
Got spots? Thats ok, youre human.

Trust me, the more positive self talk that you do, the more you will feel positive as a whole. That includes all aspects of your life, social media especially. Dont get caught up in trying to portray the perfect life, because life isnt perfect.

If you follow me on instagram you will have noticed ive decided to only post positive and encouraging things, my aim is to spread positivity and encourage others to do the same. Alter your social media so that all you see is inspiration and positivity, follow those that inspire you and unfollow or hide those who dont, its really that simple, the more positivity you subject yourself to, the better you will be at bettering your mindset.

Who inspires you is personal choice, my advice is, follow REAL people with real motives, messages and inspiration. Try not to follow or focus on pointless celebs who thrive and make money on the back of all of us feeling shit about ourselves. Dont be a sheep, be YOU. Do you honestly believe that celebs actually care about who follows them? No. This paragraph is my own veiw, if pointless celebs inspire you then thats fine. (Disclaimer: understand the phrase “pointless celebs”, that excludes the ones who actually have talent, its just a shame usually the ones with no talent seem to be the main influencers)

Be the best version of yourself that you can possibly be. Never look to the person next to you and compare, because you dont compare, noone compares, again, you are unique, you are a miracle, you are YOU, why would you want to be anything or anyone else when you are a complete individual. You have a purpose in this life, you are here for a reason, so enjoy yourself, be kind to yourself, you are so so worthy of it.

Kindness, practice this and everything else will naturally fall into place, you will feel better, think better and look better, naturally.