Dear Pregnant Me,

Congratulations are in order after a whole, long year of trying for a baby to no avail. Well, that is until you stopped obsessing over it, of course.

Sometimes you are your own worst enemy when it comes to your strong will and stubborn nature, never keen to listen to anyone but yourself until it’s long passed the time where outside advice would be of use and this was no different.

How many people told you it would happen when you’re not thinking about it?

And needless to say, when you were just starting to lose hope and put the trying to conceive in the back of your mind you finally got your positive test (a good hundred negatives later or maybe even more).

Regardless, here you are carrying your whole world inside your tummy, your little boy you secretly hoped for, preparing for the biggest and most exciting adventure you will ever go on.

Life as you know it is about to change massively in the months ahead and I could never prepare you for what’s around the corner with words alone or anything else for that matter but as I write this I can’t help wondering if that’s for the best anyway.

Right now you will be noticing the little changes and adapting accordingly: the tiredness, the hunger, the hormones and the gradually growing tummy which will eventually start to look like a baby bump as opposed to a beer belly, I promise.

The nursery is painted and there’s a few bits of furniture in it along with a handful of clothes and baby grows, pram all set up and waiting despite the superstitions. You’re worrying over not having the time or money to buy everything you think you will need for baby K’s arrival but you really needn’t stress over it.

Everything will come together nicely and you’ll be surprised at how little you actually use most of the things you buy or how keen other Mam’s are to help out when baby grows too quick for you to keep up.

As usual, you’re spending a lot of time obsessing over the house, the cleaning, moving furniture and making sure everything is just so. I can’t stress enough how trivial these things are in the grand scheme of things.

I see you rolling your eyes but I’m serious, stop fussing and please stop wasting so much precious time and energy.

The washing will never go away, the skirting boards will get dusty again, there’ll come a time when the bits on the carpet will be the least of your worries and you’ll realise that a full sink of dishes will not be the thing that ends the world.

If there’s one piece of advice I want you to take it’s to put those swollen feet up, read until your hearts content with copious amounts of hot cuppas and get some much needed you time.

Trust me, you deserve it.

Spend some quality time with Carl, lie in bed together on his days off all day if you feel like it and thoroughly make the most of it being just you two. Spend that last twenty pound and get out and do something memorable together, you won’t regret it and neither will he.

When you’re tired, sleep.

In actual fact, sleep when you’re not if you want to. Sleep for full days or lie in for many mornings in a row. This may be the last time in a very very long time that you will have free reign over getting some shut eye and believe me you will need it.

Enjoy having the bed to yourself and enjoy having Carl in it with you, it’s amazing how much room a tiny little human can actually take up.

Look after yourself, please.

Go and get your hair done before the days of living with it in a damp and messy bun. Get it died, cut and blow dried, get your nails done, go for that prenatal massage you kept putting off, buy yourself some make-up and skin care, lie in the bath for hours on end.

This is the last time in your life you can be shamelessly and unapologetically selfish so make the most of it. Before long, you will never put yourself first again and you won’t have anytime for the little things you now take for granted.

Take everything people tell you right now with a pinch of salt.

Everyone treats you differently now you’re pregnant, checking in, offering help both now and when baby comes, making plans and promises and it admittedly feels good.

Once he arrives those people will become as insignificant as their empty promises and you will often feel alone and isolated but this is something that is going to make you stronger as a Woman, more invincible than you ever believed possible.

Don’t dwell on it and focus on those who really matter.

I know right now you are counting the days, the hours, the minutes even until the big day. Wishing away time like it’s nothing but just know that time is everything.

Take a step back, breathe and enjoy being pregnant. You may not think it at this moment but you will miss it dearly and there will be times you will be wishing these days back. I know it’s dragging painfully now but before you know it you will blink and the weeks will disappear just like that.

Savour every moment of having your boy tucked up within the safety of your body.

I know you are desperate for his arrival, so eager to dive into Motherhood and rightly so. It’s the most fulfilling thing you will ever do. Those newborn baby days are what I can only describe as fast-paced, beautiful chaos and it only gets crazier.

But don’t underestimate how hard this is going to be.

It’s not all baby cuddles, smiles and giggles. You are about to he pushed to your mental and physical limits. You will be challenged in ways you aren’t expecting. There will be exhaustion, frustration and so, so many tears.

Some days you won’t want to go on. You’ll struggle through the hours just you and baby on no sleep at all and you will wonder how you’re going to keep this up. It can seem daunting and endless.

It’s all worth it, you will get through the difficult and it does get easier.

The changes are about to occur not only in your life but in yourself too are going to be monumental but you must work hard to get there; you must push through these new challenges and make it to the one’s waiting around the corner. Each one you overcome will further equip you for the next and before you know it you will be able to take on anything.

I want to tell you to divert your focus from baby alone and begin some early preparation for the silent farewell you must make as you greet him for the first time.

You’re about to say goodbye to the you you’ve known for 25 years. The things you’ve done, the mistakes you’ve made, your journey, your accomplishments.

You’ll bid farewell to the loud and outrageous personality you once owned, the craziness lined with subtle immaturity.

You will never look in the mirror and see the same person again.

None of that really matters once your boy is placed on your chest.

You’re not a girl any longer, you’re a Woman. A Mother. You’re the most important person in the whole world to your Son and will be for this day and every day to follow.

Remember when I mentioned how stubborn you are?

That’s something you should keep hold of as everyone will question how you want to do things and the choices you’re making with your baby but trust me, only you know what’s best for the both of you and don’t let anyone persuade you otherwise.

You are fierce and courageous, you’re stronger than you even know and you’re going to do the most amazing job you possibly can.