You know you are a mum when…

Everything in life revolves around sleep!

Something that I used to take for granted has now become my number one obsession! This is mainly because as I mentioned in a previous post my son isn’t a great sleeper so if I manage to get 2 hours unbroken sleep I feel like I have won the lottery! Every morning my husband and I like to have a competition to see who has made it through the night with the shortest sleep, I am currently in the lead! Day time naps are precious too and it is a toss up between taking a nap myself or catching up on some housework! Dear help anyone who dares make a noise or ring the doorbell during this sacred time!

Talking about poo and cleaning up poo is perfectly normal

Before my son was born I could count on one hand the number of dirty nappies I had changed. Anytime I babysat for friends I had all my fingers and toes crossed that their little dears would hold off on the bowel movements until I was safely out of there! Once I had my own son though cleaning stinky bums was no problem. The only thing that turns my stomach during dirty nappy changing time is when my dog tries to eat it!! Talking about poo is also a pretty common conversation in our house, if I go out one of the first things I ask when I come home is ‘was there a dirty nappy’ then I need to discuss in more detail the consistency and quantity! Is this not a normal family mealtime conversation?!

You aren’t even fazed when you realise you have gone out with snot stuck to your top

I frequently look down to see some form of dried gunk stuck to me. Even though everything is clean coming out of the wardrobe I never seem to make it out the door without getting some kind of bodily fluid or mushed up food lovingly smeared over me! I love my baba hugs though so if they come with snot attached I don’t care!

Baby wipes are your best friend

Following on from my previous point baby wipes can fix everything.

Dirt on your top – use baby wipes

Dirt on your baby – use baby wipes

Dirt on your dog – use baby wipes

The housework you have neglected – baby wipes will fix that too!

Going anywhere by yourself feels weird

If I mange to go to the toilet or on special occasions get a shower by myself it feels weird. Even before my son was born I had a dog tapping the shower door to let me know I had been in too long so having the luxury of just standing under the water for the sake of it feels like a holiday to me! Leaving the house on my own is even weirder, I hardly know what to do with my hands with no baby/pram or nappy bag to fill them!

The wheels on the bus is playing on a loop in your head

For months my son would only take his feed when one particular nursery rhyme YouTube video was playing in the background. I knew every word of that video and what song was going to come on next, even after turning off the TV I couldn’t turn it off in my head!!

You go out to buy something for yourself and come back with a car full of baby things

I just can’t walk past cute baby outfits, cool toys or sweet baby keepsakes. As I’m on unpaid maternity leave the only way to justify buying everything is to forfeit what I was going to buy for myself. When you are out with your baby though no one even looks at you anyway so it doesn’t matter that everything in my wardrobe is from 2008!