As One Passes

Sooooooo heeeellooo!

In January 2015, my husbands grandfather passed away. It was his step dads, dad and he was called Frank. For me, I believe this is true as he passed then my daughter arrived.

Frank was a lovely man, very sweet and loved to tell me different stories about the war, life and his family. Sometimes we would divert onto other topics about Clarke and his siblings, how his son, Clarke’s – stepdad was when he was younger and how proud he was of him now. He welcomed me into his home and we got on really well.

But unfortunately he got really ill just before Christmas. We all knew this was the last Christmas we would spend with him so we made sure he thoroughly enjoyed himself. A big family roast, his favourite food and opening presents next to the fire. I made sure I had my camera with me so his family could savour them. Just after New Years 2015, he peacefully passed away in his sleep.

We arrived at his funeral, the service was lovely. When we got to his wake, I had two or three relatives turn to me and say ‘as one passes, another enters. I bet you’ll get pregnant this year’. I joked it off as you do with superstitions and got on with the day.

Now fast forward, I got married in 2014. Since the day of our wedding day, we had been trying to get pregnant and start our own family. But it wasn’t happening. In March 2015, two months after he has passed away, I was diagnosed with PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome) and I knew how crushing this disease was. I knew and still know women who are trying to get pregnant, I was scared. The doctors then prescribed Metiformin which is something to help your insulin.

I believed I was infertile. Even when I was younger, I would tell my mum ‘I have a feeling that I can’t have kids’. A claim my mum would shake out of me, comforting me and disagreeing.

From March, I was taking tests everyday. Two ovulation tests, one first thing and the second before bed. And the one pregnancy test at night.

On July 10th 2015, just the day before our first wedding anniversary. I saw two lines. I couldn’t believe it! And to this day, I now stand by that saying. And in his honour we decided to name our daughters middle name Francesca, as a thank you to him.

Below I have similar stories from members of Bump, Baby and You. Some are upsetting so please bear in mind when reading and have some tissues ready.

Amy Coyne said ‘I so believe this. My husbands grand-dad died the day after our baby was born. She came a week early and then he passed the next day. He never got to meet her because he was in a different hospital. But I do think it was all meant to be that way.’

Vicki Lucy said ‘My granddad died 2 weeks before my eldest was born and my great uncle 2 weeks before my youngest. My Nan strongly believes that the passing of one member of the family before a birth is because the souls are supposed to meet to ensure a safe birth of the baby. I’m not sure if I believe it completely but it brought my Nan and a few other members of my family took comfort and strength from this. Even though she lost her husband and her brother as we had the babies to celebrate a new generation growing as we said goodbye to those in the older generation.’

Mona Spencer said ‘My grandma passed away last week. I am now 38 weeks pregnant. She was the last of my grandparents and my other half no longer has grandparents either. Both our parents will be first time grandparents just as a generation comes to an end.’

Vanessa Greggory said ‘I’ve always believed in this saying and it’s a nice way of looking at things. My great aunt passed away in December of last year, three months before I gave birth to my son. Her husband had said to me that she was making room in the family for my little one as she has spent a good life on this earth and it was now his turn to live a beautiful life.’

Rachael Griffiths said ‘Yes I truly believe this. My gran passed away when I was 30weeks pregnant, it absolutely broke me but we got such comfort and joy when my little girl arrived into the world… We gave her my grans name as her middle name too.’

Katie Fern said ‘I believe in it as my great uncle passed away in October last year and I fell pregnant that same month. I now have a 10 week old baby girl. I know they’re not the same sex but I definitely think it could be a sign.’

Ellie Densham said ‘My Gramps passed away on 27th September last year and after trying for 2 years we found out we were pregnant on the 8th November which is his birthday. I strongly believe this was to do with him.’

Liv Douglas said ‘My little girl was due on 7th July 2016.. My grandad had been ill for while and eventually passed on 5th May 2016! It’s so true and yes it gives you so much comfort. We worked it out and my beautiful little miracle was conceived in the same week that my grandad first got taken into hospital!’

Many believe that when a relative passes then that person turns into that baby’s Guardian Angel. They are there to make sure that he is safe, happy and well looked after upon entering the world.

If you have recently lost someone or you’ve been told terrible news about a loved one. I know it’s hard, it will get easier in time and I urge you to focus on the good memories.

If you have any stories you’d like to share, maybe your take on this subject then feel free to comment below or in the Facebook comments.